4 Reasons Why Now Is the Time to Start a New Habit (of Any Kind)
A psychologist explains why pushing yourself with a fresh habit results in several valuable benefits.

Think about the most successful people you know. Do they handle themselves differently compared with others in your circles? Whether it's consistently getting out of bed before dawn, taking their health seriously, or relentlessly working on self-improvement, it cannot be denied that these high achievers challenge themselves, and not just at work. That's according to psychologist Dr. Jason Richardson, who maintained top-10 status on the professional BMX circuit for most of his 15-year career, retiring with a gold medal at the 2007 Pan American Games. His philosophy: Whether it's eating differently, biking to work, taking a dance or cooking class, or even brushing your teeth with your non-dominant hand, trying out a new habit for 30, 60, or 90 days brings huge benefits. Here's what he says you can gain by challenging yourself on a personal level.

1. Expectations

By constantly striving for self-improvement, you are role modeling diligence. "It would be hard for others to complain about you asking your team to do the same," he says.

2. Empathy

When you challenge yourself, you become acutely aware of what it is like to venture on a new path. "Constantly dealing with your own emotions during a challenge can help you coach and communicate to your team on a more cellular level as they experience their respective growing pains," he says.

3. Perspective

Pushing yourself forces your brain to find the best way to get things done. And if you practice a new skill long enough, your neurons fire and wire together to make it ahabit. "We learn to look at things differently," he says. "We connect dots that might not have otherwise even been noticed."

4. Mettle

This word is a noun that means "courage and fortitude." It's true--self-improvement takes time, dedication, and strength. "It is good to know you still got it and can get it," he says. "More importantly, you are willing to go for it."

Thank you to: Christina Desmarais for this article

Perfect Icebreakers: 8 Smart Phrases That Will Make You Better at Networking

Perfect Icebreakers: 8 Smart Phrases That Will Make You Better at Networking
A simple hello can lead to a million things. Know the right phrases to be successful.

Here are eight perfect icebreakers to learn and practice.

1. Hi, my name is . . .

Start with the basics. Put out your hand, flash a genuine smile, make eye contact, and introduce yourself. From there the person you're talking with will almost certainly share their name, and you're already off to a good start.

2. What do you do?

People love to talk about themselves. If you're inquisitive and curious, most people will pick it up from there and carry the talking. Again, it's a question of starting with the basics.

3. What business are you in?

A slightly different version of "What do you do?" Either can be appropriate, depending on the event and the person. You may even want to use both. If you learn that you're talking with an accountant, you can ask, "Are you with an accounting firm, or do you work for a business in a different industry?"

4. What do you like about your job?

Open-ended questions like this are a great follow-up, because they probably can't be answered in a couple of words. It reinforces positivity and communicates interest in their work.

5. How did you get started in this kind of work?

You can learn so much about someone if you hear even a bit about their journey instead of focusing exclusively on the here and now. And when people start telling their story, things can really get interesting.

6. What are you hoping to get out of this event?

Obviously this isn't a question to ask at, say, a birthday party for a board member, but if the focus is professional, it's worth a try. It gives the other person a chance to communicate something about themselves indirectly--is their answer funny, sarcastic, sincere, dismissive?

7. I love your work.

If you're talking with someone well-known, expressing admiration for their work can be a good starting place. From there, you can pivot into something more open-ended, like "I heard you speak about your new project at last year's conference--how is that going?" or "One of the ideas in your book really helped me through a rough patch . . . "

8. What advice would you give someone just starting out in your industry?

With an industry veteran or older person, an open-ended hypothetical like this can lead you to valuable insights. You may also want to ask how the industry has changed during the course of their career.

The bottom line is this: Be interested in learning more about others, and you'll always have something to ask. Be willing to engage in give and take and give something of yourself as well, and you'll soon wonder what it is you were so intimidated by.

Thank you to: Lolly Daskal for writing this article

7 Ways to Look Really Confident (Even When You're Not)

7 Ways to Look Really Confident (Even When You're Not)

Nervous? Anxious? Insecure? Here are some ways to fake it that ensure you will actually make it.

1. Listen way more than you speak.

Talking a lot is a mask for insecurity. When you're nervous and insecure, it's easy to rush to fill any silence with words. (And later you often can't even remember what you said.)

Truly confident people are quiet and unassuming. They already know what they think; they want to know what you think.

To seem more confident, ask open-ended questions that give other people the freedom to be thoughtful and introspective: Ask what they do, how they do it, what they like about it, what they've learned from it, and what you should do if you find yourself in a similar situation.

When you're really nervous and aren't sure what to say, ask for advice. Implicit in the question is your respect for that person, and his or her opinion. (Otherwise, why would you have asked?)

Truly confident people realize they know a lot, but they wish they knew more, and they know the only way to learn more is to listen more.

So don't talk. Listen--and as you do, you'll find your confidence grows as you settle into a real conversation.

2. Shine the spotlight on other people.

Maybe you really did most of the work. Maybe you really did overcome major obstacles. Maybe you really did turn an an eclectic mix of people into an incredibly high-performing team.

Maybe you really do deserve all the glory. But don't seek it. Shine the spotlight on other people.

Confident people don't care about accolades. (Inside they're proud, as well they should be.) Confident people don't need the glory; they know what they've achieved.

They don't need the validation of others, because true validation comes from within.

So stand back and celebrate your accomplishments through others. Stand back and let others shine--that's a confidence boost that helps those people become confident too.

When you do, other people won't think you're shy or lacking in confidence. They'll think you're a lot more confident than you are, simply because you don't need the praise.

And they'll respect you for it too--which will only build your confidence.

3. Frequently ask for help.

Many people feel asking for help is a sign of weakness; implicit in the request is a lack of knowledge, skill, or experience. That's especially true when you don't feel confident--the last thing you want is to seem even less confident than you already are.

Actually, the opposite is true. Confident people are secure enough to admit a weakness.

They often ask others for help, not only because they are secure enough to admit they need help but also because they know that when they seek help they pay the person they ask a huge compliment. Saying "Can you help me?" shows tremendous respect for that individual's expertise and judgment. (Otherwise, you wouldn't ask.)

So when you need help, ask. Not only will you get the assistance you need, you'll also seem more confident and self-assured.

Win-win.

4. Never put down other people.

People who like to gossip, who like to speak badly of others, almost always do so because they hope, by comparison, to make themselves look better. (In short, when someone else looks bad I get to feel better about myself.)

Confident people don't put other people down. The only comparison a confident person makes is to the person she was yesterday--and to the person she hopes to someday become.

5. Own your mistakes.

Insecurity breeds artificiality; confidence breeds sincerity and honesty.

That's why confident people admit their mistakes. They enjoy sharing their screwups. They don't mind serving as the cautionary tale. They don't mind being a source of laughter--for others and for themselves.

When you're confident, you don't mind occasionally "looking bad." You realize that that when you're genuine and unpretentious, people don't laugh at you.

They laugh with you.

So don't try to be more impressive than you are. Don't try to seem perfect. Go the opposite way: Be human. Real confidence doesn't come from building a façade; real confidence is based on having nothing to hide.

5. Burn off some anti-confidence chemicals.

When you feel anxious or stressed, your adrenal glands secrete cortisol, one of the chemical triggers of the instinctive fight-or-flight reflex. High levels of cortisol heighten your emotions, limit your creativity, and reduce your ability to process complex information.

When you're "high" on cortisol, you get tunnel vision, just as you do when you're startled or scared.

What's the solution? Burn off excess cortisol with exercise. Take a walk at lunch. Work out before you leave for work. Hit the hotel gym before your meeting.

Don't think it will help? Think back to a time when you were totally stressed and decided to work out. (If you can't think of one, you're missing out on a great stress-relieving tool.) I bet you felt a lot less anxious and a lot more grounded after you finished exercising.

The perspective you gained came at least in part from lowering your cortisol levels. When you need to feel more confident, schedule in a little exercise. It works.

6. Avoid qualifiers.

Investment materials are full of words like may, might, could, should for compliance reasons. The content includes plenty of qualifiers in order to avoid even the hint of a promise.

When you're nervous, you do the same thing. You say "maybe." You say "possibly." You say " ... well, that's what I think, at least."

In short, you're afraid to take a strong position in case it turns out you're wrong.

Don't be. Say what you think. Say what you believe. Then listen, and if it turns out you were wrong, that's great--because that gives you the chance to show you're secure enough in yourself to admit when you don't have all the answers.

7. Be the one who volunteers.

Aren't sure how to fit into a new group? It's actually easy.

The best approach is to find ways to make the lives of people in that group a little easier. So step up and volunteer. Volunteer to do a little grunt work. Volunteer for the glory-free tasks. Volunteer to do something other people don't want to do.

In short, volunteer to pay your dues. Say to yourself, "I am the one who volunteers." (Thanks, Walt.)

Volunteering does a couple of cool things. One, you get involved with other people in the group, and that will help you fit in and feel like part of the team. Two, and just as important, you'll gain their respect--and that will make you feel a lot more confident.

Thank you to Jeff Haden for writing this article.

The 3-Step Method to Running a Great Meeting, From Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella

The 3-Step Method to Running a Great Meeting, From Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella
Words of wisdom--from the guy who's making Microsoft exciting again.

Meetings.

They're the great conundrum of businesses, large and small. We groan when we think about bad meetings--boring, unproductive, and devouring precious time that we'll never see again. But meetings done right can be the birthplace of great ideas and a wonderful platform to receive vital, real-time feedback.

Recently I came across the following interview, with Microsoft CEO Satya Nadellaspeaking to The Wall Street Journal about a variety of topics. I'm a fan of what Nadella has done with Microsoft since taking the reins in 2014, and I especially appreciated the wisdom he drops regarding running meetings. (You can find the video at the end of this post; Nadella addresses meetings at the 1:04 mark.)

Nadella's method:

Listen more. Talk less. And be decisive when the time comes.

You may not find this method earth-shattering, but the brilliance is in its conciseness.

Let's break down why it's so effective.

Listen more.

The ability to listen well has become increasingly rare, especially with so many distractions from technology. Much too often those leading meetings aren't listening actively--many times due to a lack of preparation or focus.

The job of a chairman or moderator is to guide a meeting to its most productive outcome--and he or she can't do that without listening carefully to everyone involved.

Talk less.

Talking less should obviously lead to greater opportunities for listening, but there's more to it than that.

As the leader of a meeting, learning to bite your tongue accomplishes the following:

• Others have greater chances to speak their minds
• You balance rational thought with emotional outbursts
• You can form better questions to keep the discussion focused
• You have time to think

As a wise friend once told me: No one ever learned anything while speaking.

Be decisive.

Less talking and more listening is great, but it doesn't mean anything if you can't make solid decisions by the end of the meeting. And remember: If no one is assigned ownership of a task, it's not going to get done.

Accomplishing the first two steps will better equip you to carry out this final step.

Don't worry about making a bad decision--even the best are guilty of those at times. By maintaining a bias for action, you can learn from mistakes and keep things moving.

(And if you enjoyed this advice, check out what you can learn from how Steve Jobs used to run his legendary meetings.)

Putting It into practice.

With major strategic changes including the recent acquisition of LinkedIn, Nadella seems to really be shaking things up at Microsoft--and infusing some much needed inspiration to a company that had lost its reputation as an innovator.

Take this advice to heart and increase the value of your meetings, and you'll keep your business moving in the right direction.

Thank you to Justin Bariso for writing this article.

Chicago Cares' Serv-a-thon

This passed Saturday Cloud Gate Consulting volunteered at the annual Chicago Cares' Serve-a-thon. Our team will spent the day volunteering, meeting critical needs in every corner of the city, and meeting new people along the way. We joined 5,000 volunteers who came together to paint classrooms, plant community gardens, serve meals to seniors and much more, uplifting the city we love along the way. Our Team was specifically assigned to plant community gardens. We worked a long hard day, but had a lot of fun working together. This was an awarding experience we all were happy to be a part of.

9 Things That Make You Look Really Unprofessional in Meetings

9 Things That Make You Look Really Unprofessional in Meetings
In a survey, 47 percent of people said that the meetings they attend are not productive. Don't be the reason for an unproductive meeting.

1. Being late

Routine tardiness shows an inability to respect other people's time, no matter how well intentioned you may be. Even if you're just five minutes late, people notice if it happens often. Get in the habit of arriving at meetings a few minutes early so your team isn't always waiting for you.

2. Boasting

It's no secret that conceited people often talk the most and do the least. Employers and employees alike know that. Don't boast in meetings about accomplishing things before you have actually accomplished them. In fact, get out of the habit of boasting at all--you'll be more likable, and more professional.

3. Complaining

While it's all right to let the occasional complaint slip out every now and then, nobody likes the person who constantly complains about every assignment they are given. We are get tired and hungry and frustrated, however, we don't have to always vocalize it.

4. Showing off

Asking questions is definitely a good way to get attention. Asking too many questions--just to show off your knowledge--looks really unprofessional. Tone down the questions, and you'll give off the impression that you have it much more together.

5. Looking sloppy

Although meetings can be informal, showing up to one looking like you just rolled out of bed is not appealing. In fact, showing up to work looking sloppy every day is not appealing, period.

6. Playing hooky

We all take a day or two off work when we need it--whether it be for emotional, illness, or personal reasons. Doing this often--and on days when you know there will be meetings at which you should be present--reflects poorly on you.

7. Playing with your phone or laptop

You should not text, play games, browse social media, or check sports scores while in a meeting. It shows an utter lack of respect for the time of everyone around you trying to make things run efficiently.

8. Interrupting

Waiting your turn to speak up is necessary to show that you are both paying attention and respectful of the opinions of others. Don't downplay the fact that you are able to do both.

9. Swearing

No matter how casual your workplace can be, it's important not to bring that culture to a space where people are working to be as professional as possible. Save the curse words for after you clock out for the day.

Thank you to Peter Economy for writing this article.

7 Things Confident People Always Say

7 Things Confident People Always Say
Of all the traits a person can possess, this one may be most highly correlated with success.

Of all the personality traits, confidence may be most highly correlated with success. In business, it helps a person take risks and pursue opportunities. And compared with insecure people, those who are confident are perceived as more attractive and tend to have a larger circle of high-quality relationships.

What is it about confidence that's so enticing? First off, it's important to make distinctions about what confidence is not. It's not cockiness or a sense of being better than others. Rather, it's a quiet belief in one's own ability without the hubris that results in arrogance. Here are the kinds of things you'll hear truly confident people say.

1. "I wouldn't worry about it."

Go to a confident friend with a list of "what-ifs" or reasons why something may turn out badly and you'll likely hear this kind of reassurance. It's because confident people generally don't worry. They understand that even if something goes wrong, they can handle it. It's the persistent feeling that regardless of what happens--good or bad--they will cope.

2. "Go for it."

Along with a lack of anxiety comes a sense of optimism. Truly confident people expect good things to happen. At the same time, their track record of making good decisions means they also possess the ability to temper their positivity with realistic thinking.

3. "Doing it this way works for me."

Confident individuals don't feel compelled to conform to gain acceptance from others. This is the central beauty of confidence--the calm self-assurance that makes others want to follow.

4. "Why not me?"

Instead of waiting around for the next opportunity, confident people seek it out. Maybe it's building the right relationships, asking for a promotion or otherwise taking a leap of faith. These people have a vision for the future and chart their own path to get there.   

5. "I need to say something."

Confident people take a stand when it comes to matters of right and wrong yet possess the wisdom to understand which battles are worth fighting. That said, they'llback down graciously if proved wrong, because they're secure enough to consider viewpoints other than their own.

6. "Tell me more."

Confident people listen far more than they talk, are naturally curious, and express a genuine interest in others. Conversely, those who monopolize conversations or brag (ever) have something to prove and are masking insecurity.

7. "Can you help me?"

Everyone has weaknesses, but the self-assured are not afraid to admit them. Instead of worrying what others will think if they ask for help, confident people are more concerned with self-improvement, gaining valuable skills, and performing a job well. 

Thank you to Christina Desmarias for writing this article.

Successful People Swear by These 5 Morning Mantras

Successful People Swear by These 5 Morning Mantras
Fight the Monday morning blues with these simple, easy-to-remember mantras.

1. Today I am thankful for...

Oprah has a gratitude journal. For years, she's written down five things she's grateful for. She claims it's the single most important thing she's ever done. Oprah stresses physically writing these five things down because it consciously forces you to observe what you have to be thankful for.

"If you concentrate on what you have, you'll end up having more -- even if it's just $2," she says in Oprah's LifeClass. And the things can be very simple. One of Oprah's examples? Eating cold melon on a bench in the sun. That's an actual entry from her own gratitude journal on October 12, 1996.

2. I have what it it takes to get through today.

If you're living as good of a life as Oprah, then finding things to be grateful for sounds easy. But what if you received terrible news yesterday or simply woke up on the wrong side of the bed? If negativity creeps in the second you open your eyes, immediately start building yourself up. Remind yourself you've made it here. And you've got what it takes to keep going.

"Thinking things like 'I can't do this,' or 'This isn't fair,' will cause you to feel defeated," says Amy Morin, author of 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do. "If you've made it this far in life, you clearly have some skills, tools, and resources already in place." Morin recommends several more build-yourself-up mantras. Remind yourself that the best you can do is the best you can do. And to put things in perspective, ask yourself if whatever's troubling you will matter five years from now.

3. Today I will accomplish...

Ever surprised to discover it's suddenly 5 p.m. and you haven't gotten a lick of work done?

Instead of reacting to the barrage of emails or fighting fires throughout your day, there's a better way to get a handle on your day. It starts before those emails even start rolling in.

Take a proactive approach first thing in the morning by making a short to-do list of what you absolutely must accomplish today. Keeping it short is key. Cramming too many tasks on your to-do list is setting yourself up to fail. A concise list also forces you to cut out what's not important. It creates division between what's important and what's urgent. And it gives you clear direction on which tasks you will expend energy on today.

If it's impossible to narrow down your to-do list to just a few items, then break it out into mini lists. For example, Shark Tank investor Barbara Corcoran prioritizes things that will make her money and move business forward, FastCompany reports.

While there are plenty of apps or online tools that can help, she prefers the old-fashioned way. "And while I've tried different online to-do lists, I cannot work off of a to-do list that isn't written or typed," Corcoran told FastCompany. "The delete button will never give you the kicks that crossing off tasks will give you."

4. What's my big, ambitious goal for the day?

Your to-do list may contain the tasks you need to plow through today. But don't forget about the big picture. Both Steve Jobs and Benjamin Franklin famously challenged themselves each morning to seize the day with a big-picture question.

In his famous 2005 Stanford commencement speech, Steve Jobs said he looked at himself in the mirror each morning and asked, "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?"

Benjamin Franklin's daily routine started at 5 a.m. Throughout his 3-hour morning routine of rising, washing and contriving the day's business, he reflected on The Question: "What good shall I do today?"

5. My intention for today is...

Yoga instructors often ask you to set an intention at the top of the class. The goal is to pick a word that will help you focus your attention. If your mind wanders, you're supposed to come back to that word. For example, if you've been feeling frustrated with your inflexibility to get into a particular pose, your intention might be "patience." If you're stepping onto your mat after a stressful and busy day and are having trouble slowing down your mind, your word might be "calm."

It's the same approach for setting an intention at the start of your day. Think through what's planned for today. Is there a word or intention that you want to channel throughout your your jam-packed day of meetings? As you go about your day, try to keep this word in mind.

Thank you to Betsy Mikel for writing this article.