5 Ways to Better Resolve Conflict

5 Ways to Better Resolve Conflict
It seems people would sometimes rather just fight. Try these tips to resolve even the most difficult conflicts.

1. Leave the past behind, begin with the present.

How you got here doesn't really matter except to keep you from getting here again. Deal with the situation as if it were brand new. Let go of the harbored ill feelings rather than seeking revenge for past transgressions. A grudge serves no one and negativelyimpacts everyone.

2. Find the humanity.

It is so easy to forget that the people you are in conflict with are in fact other human beings with their own needs, wants, and flaws. Just like you, they are subject to making mistakes, sometimes without realizing how they may affect you. You may think that these people are against you or your beliefs but in many cases, the struggle is with themselves and you are not a part of that equation. You are simply in the way.

3. Express compassion.

What does this person need? Is it basic survival or simply understanding? Connect with your empathy. Look for positive ways you can improve how they feel about you as an individual. Then they may have more relaxed perspectives about the crucial areas of disagreement.

4. Listen objectively to the other side's narrative.

It is easy to make assumptions about other peoples' motives when they inflict some sort of trouble on us. Do your best to objectively listen to what they are saying while suppressing your inner voice. You might learn a great deal about the impact you are having on the relationship, both positive and negative.

5. Examine your own narrative.

You may find yourself frustrated by others, but often the problem lies within your own perception and personal issues. Take a look at your story from an opposite perspective. Write down the actions that led up to the conflict as if you were the other person. You may learn that you had the ability to resolve or even prevent the conflict all along.

Thank you to Kevin Daum for writing this article.